At this time of year it’s almost impossible to get in through the door of a Gym for the number of sweating, Lycra clad bodies within. Leave it until March though and there is no waiting to use the equipment, no difficulty in finding a locker for your your things and no one else there. Everybody started the year with the best of intentions but they soon faded away. Have your resolutions bitten the dust yet?
This is typical of many New Year’s resolutions and lots of people I speak to don’t bother to make them any more. The problem is that the resolutions make sense at the time – lose weight, get fit, give up smoking or spend more time with family for example, but unless something changes at an unconscious level, the change will not stick.
In this article, I will show you how to make sure that you really want the change, that the resolution is not just sensible but is what you really want, and how to make sure you keep your resolution.
This is an incredibly simple and powerful process. Delegates on my NLP courses have made major changes in their lives by following it.
Personally, it is the reason we now live in Cornwall instead of Cheshire (and have done for fifteen years), it’s the reason we have run our business for nineteen years, why we have an office overlooking the sea, why Fiona opened a cafe a year ago and the reason I’m playing bass in a band after thirty years of not touching the instrument.
If I can add any advice to this I would remind you of the phrase ‘be careful what you wish for’ – because this really works.
Ask yourself the following questions (and write the answers down -it really helps).
1. What specifically do you want?
Be as specific as possible – and state your goal in a positive way, you can’t process negatives directly. If I say “don’t think of a cat” what happens? Similarly, if you say you don’t want to be working here in three years time, guess what?
2. Where are you now in relation to your goal?
What is your position at the moment – be realistic, if you want to lose weight,what is your weight right now? What are you currently doing to lose weight?
3. How will you know when you have achieved your goal?
What evidence will you have that you have achieved it? What will you see? What will you hear? ( what will other people say?, what will you say to yourself? Are there any other sounds you will hear?) How will you feel?
Make the image really compelling -something you really would like. This creates a tension in your mind between where you want to be and where you are, and is really motivating.
4. Is there any other evidence?
Is there anything you missed in question 3 that is helpful?
5. What will this goal get for you, or allow you to do?
A goal isn’t an end in itself, people don’t do the lottery to pile the money up and look at it, they do the lottery for the things the money will allow them to do. Ask yourself this questions several times – that will help you to get to the real benefit of the change.
6. Are you in control of it?
Can you make this happen? Or does it rely on something outside of your control? If it does, you will find it really difficult (or impossible) to achieve.
7. When do you want it? Who with? And where?
This is really important. Set your self a deadline, and be specific – not just, ‘by the summer’ pick a month, date and time. The more specific you are, the more likely you are to make it happen.
8. What resources do you need?
Have you ever done this before? If you have, it’s much easier to do it again, also ask yourself what can you learn from that experience?
If you haven’t done it, do you know anyone who has? What can you learn from their experience?
What other resources do you need? Money, time, skills etc.
9. What will you gain, and what will you lose if you achieve this?
There is no gain without loss, and no loss without gain.
The important thing is to be aware of the losses and the gains and weigh them against each other. If the losses outweigh the gains, you will not achieve your goal.
And that’s it! Follow the process and ensure that you never miss a New Year’s Resolution again – in fact you don’t even need to make them at New Year, but can use this process at any time, for any goal.
We have some free software available on our website to help you through the process just follow the link.
Good luck, and have a happy year.